“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
As a high school senior applying to college, uncertainty seems to be a recurring theme in my life. A year from now, I could be anywhere from California to New England–I actually do not know. People often ask me where I’m going to college, and I tell them that I’d like to know the answer to that question just as much as they would.
Last fall, I did everything I could to secure my future by filling out seven applications to seven different schools. (Most required essays.) But the instant I clicked the “submit” button, it was quite literally out of my hands. Any control that I had over my future was taken from me. I had done my part, and now I just had to wait and hope and pray.
Have I embraced the uncertainty? I suppose. The first acceptance letter was a relief; now, if all else fails, at least I know I will be going to college. But so much remains unknown. Even once I make a decision, there will still be so many unknowns. What classes will I take? Will I meet people like me? Will I find a good church group? How much sleep will I get? How difficult will it be? How stressful? How fun?
Sometimes I worry about it. Most times I just worry about finishing high school. But sometimes–and I can’t explain why, except through God–I don’t worry. During those moments, I realize that where I end up, and who I end up with, doesn’t really matter. The lessons I need–in wisdom, in faith, in academics–can be learned almost anywhere, and certainly at any college. Even if I mess up, I’ll be wiser for it. College will be an adventure, and the newness of it all will be half the fun.
During those moments, I realize that this is something entirely beyond my control. And since I can’t delude myself into thinking that I have control over my life–as I so often do–I am able, for perhaps the first time in my life, to truly and completely place my trust in God.
Dear God, please be with me in this time of uncertainty. Be with all of us as we tread these unknown paths, and guide us to where You need us to go. Help us to listen for Your guidance and to trust in it when it comes. Amen.